Troubles
in
Town
Written by Hunter-Chameleon (Quint)
(Shortly after the events of “Enter: Marauder”, the Mercs are soon arrived to Megalopolis)
Hunter:
I have
good news,
guys!
We'll be
arrived
soon at
Megalopolis!
Shinobu:
Sounds
great,
but...How
will we
land?Hunter:
Err...
Kayorei:
...Hunter:
I knew I
forgot
something.
Stardust:
We're
gonna
CRASH!(And so, the Marauder hit the ground in quite a rude way. Luckily, it was out of the town, so no major buildings were damaged in the process. The statement doesn't truly apply to the battleship's residents, however.)
Falling
star:
Ouch...
Iga:
Next time
you drive
that
thing,
Hunter, I
want to
see your
license!Hunter:
*sighs*
Anyways,
(activates
a screen
on the
main
monitor),
what are
the
damages to
the
boat?
Crew
Joe (on
the
screen):
Very
minor,
sir.
However,
some
pieces
will need
a
revision.Hunter:
You heard
the bot,
guys.
We'll need
to find a
mechanic.Iga:
If I
remember
well,
there's
the right
shop on
Hoggan's
Alley. We
should go
and have a
look.Stardust:
Stop it
now! I
didn't
escape
death only
to buy
motor
pieces! I
want to
have a day
off!Falling
star:
Same
here!Hunter:
Oh, all
right. Do
what you
want, but
remember:
I want all
of you
here at 7
o'clock.
Right?
The
other
Mercs:
Right!Shinobu:
But once
we'll be
out,
anybody
will be
able to
steal the
ship.
Someone
must
remain
here and
guard the
boat.Stardust:
Yeah, but
who?(Before Stardust finished his sentence, everyone already left in a cloud of dust.)
Stardust:
Son of a
Maverick!(In town...)
Hunter:
According
to this
map,
Hoggan's
Alley is
here...Gotta
take the
metro.(But, at the ticket office...)
Hunter:
Excuse me,
sir. Could
you sell
me a
ticket?Employee: P-p-please, don't hurt me!
Hunter:
(Poor boy
is messed
up...) But
why would
I do
that?Employee: You're a W-w-wily bot!
Hunter:
Of course
not! This
is just a
suit!(While Hunter is trying to convince the frightened employee, Naoshi is wandering in the suburbs.)
Naoshi:
I'm lost.
But where
the hell
is the
bookshop?
(notices a
citizen)
Excuse me,
madam,
could you
show
me...?Woman: Ahh! A Wily-bot! Save me! (runs away)
(As the woman was fleeing from Naoshi, a group of well-known robots heard the screams)
Darksage
(Springman):
Sounds
like Wily
is
attacking
again.
Briansfox
(Slashman):
It is our
duty to go
and
help!
Shadowstrike
(Turboman):
Let's go!
Drastic
Measures,
transform
and roll
out!Naoshi:
Er...excuse
me...
Metabad
(Cloudman):
There
he
is! Get
him!Naoshi:
(In
thought)
Oh
great...what
did I get
myself
into?
(runs
away,
quickly
chased by
the
Drastic
Measures)(Back to the ship...)
Stardust:
So, how
does this
security
system
work?
Let's try
this
button...(presses
a big,
yellow-and-black
striped
button)(Suddenly, all of the screens activate, randomly showing pictures of the interiors and surroundings of the Marauder, before exploding.)
Stardust:
Oops. But
I think I
just saw
Punk in
one of the
rooms.
Gotta
see.(In the teleportation room, Shinobu was desperately trying to figure out how the system works. Sounds like he's in a hurry.)
Shinobu:
Damn...I
must be at
work in 5
minutes!
And that
Wily man
didn't put
a proper
notice!Stardust
(walks
in):
Need
a hand,
pal?Shinobu:
Why not. I
need to
get at
this
address in
Washington
DC. For
work,
y'know.Stardust:
Okay.
Stand on
the
circle...3...2...1...go!(In a back-alley of Washington DC...)
Shinobu
(warps
in):
Wow.
That was
quick. And
now, to
open the
store...(There was a malfunction in Wily's designs: when he transformed his “guinea pigs” into the Seven Mercenaries, he “disintegrated” their former bodies, including what they held in their pockets. It includes Shinobu's keys.)
Shinobu:
Next time
I meet the
doctor, I
won't be
that
friendly!
And now,
the quick
way –
Screw
Crusher!(The metallic boomerang wrecked the door, allowing the crimson juggernaut to enter.)
Shinobu:
This will
be
retained
on my
wage,
though.(Back to town, with the remaining Mercs.)
Falling
star:
So,
who's up
for going
to
Henry's?Kayorei:
I'd like
to, but I
must go to
the bank.
See you
guys!Iga:
Let's go,
Mega.(In the place...)
Henry:
Hi there,
people!
What would
you like
to
drink?Falling
star:
Mmm...let's
try some
Oil
Shaker.Henry:
You! How
is it
possible?Iga:
I don't
understand
what you
mean,
sir.Henry:
Well, how
comes that
Mega Water
has
Falling
star's
voice?Falling
star:
Some
trick of
Wily.
Anyway,
now I can
do cool
things
like...this!
(shoots
water from
his hands,
and
generates
a small
fountain.)Iga:
Nice
trick! And
it looks
like your
drink is
ready.Falling
star:
Good.
(gets to
the
bar).(What a stupid mistake. I mean, Falling went and took his drink, but totally forgot the water, which splashes the closest customer.)
Golemman (now wet): Who dare? (gets up and cracks his knuckles) Golemman crush puny green robot!
Falling
star:
Bring it
on!Henry:
(takes a
gun from
under his
bar, and
aims at
the
robotic
behemoth)
No
one
fights
here! Do
that
outside!Golem Man: (Must not mess with guy giving drinks...) Green robot and friend go out. Golemman crush puny robots out of building.
(And shortly after, a good old-fashioned brawl took place in the street.)
(But meanwhile, in Megalopolis bank...)
Kayorei:
So, I
deposit
this check
on my
account
and get
back to
the ship.
Nothing
can
go...Bank manager: Please, anyone help us! Someone is stealing the money stored in the safe-room!
Kayorei:
...wrong.
Let's go,
then.(But who was the thief? And how on Earth did he manage to get there without anyone noticing him?)
?: Hey, it's easy if you're...David Hasselhoff!
(...Oookay.)
David
Hasselhoff:
And now,
no more
doors!
*poof!*(Thanks to his MS-Paint powers, the Hoff made the doors disappear...Yeah.)
David
Hasselhoff:
Up, up and
away!
Let's get
hooked –
on a
feeling!
*flies
away*Kayorei:
Looks easy
to do.
I'll
try!(As Kayorei jumped, she crashed into Hasselhoff, and both flattened to the ground. Then the police comes in action.)
Police-Bot 1: You're under arrest! Come without resistance, Mr Hasselhoff.
David
Hasselhoff:
Ouch...next
time I
meet you,
blue bot,
you'll get
out of my
car!Police-Bot 2: Whatever...(to Kayorei): Thanks to your efforts, we caught the thief. You'll get a reward soon.
Kayorei:
G...great.
*faints*(Back to saner stuff, with Hunter who managed to get into the metro.)
Hunter:
Hoggan's
Alley is
that way.
Let's go,
then.
(walks
away)Naoshi
(running
and
yelling at
the same
time):
GAHHHHH!!!!!Drastic
Measures
(still
chasing
him):
Get
back, Wily
scum!Naoshi
(stops):
Who're you
calling
Wily scum?
Come on,
fight me
if you
dare!Metabad:
Let's do
it!
Thunder
Bolt!(Quickly, the Knight Merc generated his signature weapon, chanalizing his opponent's shots and shooting them back! One down, two more to go.)
Metabad:
Aiiee!Darksage:
You sure
look like
a worthy
opponent.
Coil
Rush!(The Springing Master stretched his legs in order to charge at full speed Naoshi, only to meet head-first the Mirror Spear. Let me tell you it hurts a lot.)
Shadowstrike
(staring
at his
fallen
comrades):
Uh-oh.Naoshi:
Okay,
you're
next!
Spear
Charge!(The attack never hit. Before Naoshi could strike, two of the most formidable warriors the MM7 Team included blocked him!)
Seadragon76
(Junkman):
Looks like
you need a
hand,
pal.Briansfox
(Slashman):
Yeah, and
guess
what? The
others are
here.(In the shadows, our fellow Merc could distinguish the forms of the remaining Drastic Measures ... Freezeman, the cold-blooded robot ... Burstman, with a temper like his weapon - explosive- ... Shademan, creature of the night ... before the next assault, he could only mutter these famous last words):
Naoshi:
Motherfragging
snakes on
a
plane!(That was random)
Naoshi:
Try to
find
something
good in
this
position.(Well, it sounds interesting and all, but how is Shinobu doing in his shop? Let's find out!)
Customer: Anyone here? (knocks heavily on the counter) Hey! Hurry up!
Shinobu:
(comes
from he
backroom)
Yes?Customer: Err...well, it's...err...
Shinobu:
Explain,
please.Customer: It's...well, a problem with this game system...
Shinobu:
Let me see
this...(after
a few
tests)
Nope,
maybe it
was just a
wrong
manipulation.
Do you
want
something
else? A
game,
maybe?Customer: Yeah! G-good idea! (picks up the first game he finds) This one!
Shinobu:
Are you
sure?Customer: Sure! And keep the change! (runs out of the shop)
Shop manager: Good job, Shinobu! Thanks to you, we managed to sell every of those Barbie games. Nice cosplay suit, by the way.
Shinobu
(a bit
confused):
Er? That's
not a
cosplay.(Later, in Hoggan's Alley...)
Hunter
(leaving
the
shop):
You'll
deliver
the
components
tomorrow
morning?
Good! See
you,
then!Hunter:
Now, back
to the
ship!
(warps)
Time to
call the
others.(As the remaining Mercs received the message, they instantly warped to the Marauder's entrance, in more or less damaged armors)
Shinobu:
Everyone
here?
Good.Falling
star
(sounding
a bit
worried):
Let's
hurry in,
then! I
need to
rest!Iga
(noticing
Naoshi's
damaged
armor, and
his black
eye):
Looks like
you
suffered,
pal.Naoshi:
Drastic
Measures
fell on me
like a ton
of bricks.
Then, they
made a ton
of bricks
fall on
me.Kayorei:
How?Naoshi:
Let's say
Cloudman's
shots can
be
random.(But, as the ship's main door opened, a thick black smoke came out.)
Stardust
(from the
ship's
entrance):
Eh,
hi. I
wanted to
drink some
orange
juice, but
the fridge
went kinda
boom. And
the whole
kitchen,
as a
matter of
fact.Iga:
Oh. How
will we
afford to
repair
this?Kayorei
(takes out
a huge
money
bag):
Guess I
have the
solution.(Later, in the ship's restroom)
Hunter:
Man, that
was quite
a day! But
I'm pretty
sure
everyone
learned
something!
So, who
wants to
begin?Naoshi:
Never mess
with
Drastic
Measures.
They're
really
dangerous.Kayorei:
You can't
do the
things
singers do
in their
clips
without an
efficient
training.Shinobu:
Talking
with
customers
is easier
when
you're a
3-meter
tall
robot.Falling
star:
Pay
attention
to what
you're
doing, or
it ends up
with a
fight.Iga:
Golem Man
is one
strong
dude. I'll
have to
eat soup
for a
while...(rubs
his
jaw)Stardust:
And...Crew
Joe:
And
never
leave Mr
Hyper
Storm
alone
anymore!
He almost
managed to
blow the
ship
up!(True. and, also, I'm not paid enough for this! Seriously, David Hasselhoff. What will it be next time? Walking plants?)
Hunter:
You forget
something.(What? Oh yeah.)
THE END
Outside Credits: GolemMan made by the people of Mechanical Maniacs.